New Study Confirms EMTs Worst Fears

A new study from Harvard medical School has today confirmed the worst fears of many EMTs and Paramedics worldwide.

The study, which involved a survey of over 50,000 EMTs and Paramedics globally, has confirmed that it is indeed physically impossible to unload a patient from the ambulance without saying the words “couple of bumps.”

Dr Midixy Normous, M.D. said in an exclusive interview that this ground breaking discovery will hopefully lead to a cure.

“We are yet to determine the exact cause of this phenomenon, but rest assured that we will work tirelessly until we find a cure.”

This article is satire (duh).

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